We take lots of things for granted without really paying attention. Health, income, blue skies, waking up every morning. Who has the time to put thought in all that when there are so many urgent tasks to take care of?
It’s only when we are about to lose or actually losing some of the good stuff, the thought strikes, but it’s too late.
One of mom’s healthy habits is learning to appreciate the “obvious” good things in life.
Here is my personal observation from my own life:
I see a mom entering a store with her child.
Her face is twisted, she is busy thinking about something or maybe has headache. Her child is jumping happily nearby but she doesn’t notice him. Is it taken for granted that she has a healthy child who has legs and arms, who can walk and jump? Is it taken for granted that this mom lives in a peaceful country and she doesn’t have to hide from bombs or suffer from hunger like millions of people? Is it taken for granted that she can afford to buy stuff she probably doesn’t need in a cosmetics department where I see her heading right from the entrance?
Why are the good things taken for granted but the bad things are always highlighted?
Since I’m the mom who likes to take action I decided to start the big change from myself.
The journey to the true being started long time ago but putting it into words isn’t an easy task – it took me a while to decide how to put it together nicely. I’ll break it into steps:
Creating a routine of watching one’s thoughts – any mom can do that, and kids can only help, since they constantly remind how messy life is, how useless lots of things are, how meaningless is everything (in a good way, I mean). Here is an example: mom cleans the table, child spills milk on it, mom cleans it again, then notices crumbs on the floor, she starts cleaning the floor, another child comes and accidentally steps on the accurate pile of crumbs ready-to-be-thrown into the garbage can. Mom has to start all over again. Do you see what I mean? Meaningless it is, and this is just an illustration, a reflection of everything we do. A super important project, a work plan, a diet or anything that looks important to you at this stage of life – on the big scale, it’s not more important than cleaning the bread crumbs. Remember, I said “on the big scale”, don’t catch me on this one.
After creating a healthy routine of watching one’s thoughts, a mom can start slowly pushing the thoughts in the right direction but never analyzing them too deeply (a very distracting and useless habit). By pushing thoughts into the right direction I mean actually planning the scenario of what is the next thing I am going to think about. Of course thins is not possible with kids screaming around, or when you are running late on the bus or any crazy thing of that kind. Once having mastered the skill, a mom can handle her thoughts pretty well even in stressful situations. It’s better to start practicing in calm environment though, better when you’re alone – spend the precious 10, 20, 30 minutes of solitude to watch the movie going on in your head. Some people call it meditation but you can call it white bunny if you like.
There are other steps but they are related to a more advanced stage of white bunny meditation (as you have guessed, it was all about meditation from the beginning of this article).